“We met in first grade.”
“We met in a weight-loss group.”
“We met at an anti-Valentine’s Day party.”
“We had the same car. By accident, he loaded his groceries into mine.”
“I was getting my iPhone fixed and so was he.”
This eye-opening list appeared in the April issue of Glamour and I loved it (not one mention of finding love on an app). It comes from Brooklyn Sherman, the creator of the Instagram sensation The Way We Met. The article is “as told to” by Emily Mahaney.
Sherman says that she has 300,000 followers and hears every kind of couple talk about how they first got together. She believes that this is proof – to even the biggest dating skeptic – that there is love and a match out there for all of us.
Full disclosure: When I met my husband, there was no OkCupid. I was walking with a girlfriend on Third Avenue near East 49th Street in Manhattan when we ran into one of her male friends. She introduced us, we clicked and that was it.
Sherman becomes more explicit and says, “What I have learned is that while love doesn’t come with guarantees, the couples who fell in love for the long haul did at least one of these things.
THEY DIDN’T RELY ON DESTINY Couples who share their stories on The Way We Met by and large don’t rely on apps. They meet people when they are out and about. They also put themselves in unexpected situations in order to meet someone. They said “yes” to blind dates, they agreed to be auctioned off for charity and they go stag (happily) to a friend’s wedding.
THEY WERE WILLING TO BE EMBARRASSED There’s no shame if your ego gets a little bruised on the way to finding The One. Take Brooke. On her first date with Adam (he cooked for her) she texted to a friend, “OMG, I’m here. He’s SO HOT!” Then she mistakenly sent the message to Adam. “I contemplated running out the door as he read the text”. He looked up at me. Then in the nicest way he said, “I think you meant to send this to someone else.”
WE RECENTLY FOUND THAT 37% OF WOMEN MET THEIR #1 GUY AT SCHOOL OR WORK – ONLY 9% MET AT A BAR OR PARTY
THEY DIDN’T CLOSE OFF After a breakup, it’s a good idea to make your relationship with yourself a priority – invest in a job, spend time with friends – but don’t put up walls.
THEY LISTEN TO THEIR INSTINCTS One final thing: despite all the other variables, The Way We Met couples pay attention to their gut instinct. They often talk about going on epic eight-hour first dates and many become “official” after only a few days.
Here’s an important point: these people took the time to get to know the person in front of them instead of getting distracted by the people they could be dating if they started swiping on their phone.
MAY WE SUGGEST…
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Shaun Nelson-Henrick
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